Cold hearted

I am practically living my life all alone and no one else to call my own. People always left me and they always took me for granted. I am yet to find the one person that I'm supposed to be with, I am yet to find a place where I will truly belong. People always said that they loved me but they always end up hurting me. They always made me believed that their hearts are true but they always ended up telling me that they never really loved me. This got me thinking, what is the true meaning of love? Is it all just an illusion?

All I wanted was to be loved and accepted for who and what I am. I remembered a Christian song wherein it tells us not to let our heart be hardened and not to let our love grow cold. How can my heart remain soft and warm when the world around me is cruel and unforgiving? How can I not let it become stone cold when the people around me were never true to me in the first place?

Am I destined to live my life and grow old alone? I don't know what to do anymore, living, growing old and dying alone is my greatest fear. I know I still have a lot of love to give but nobody would give me that chance. Maybe I'm better off being by myself, maybe I'm going to make it on my own if I could just stop feeling like this and allow my heart to die and become lifeless and as cold as it could ever be...